First off; Torchwood Series Two. I’ve been watching more of it – I’ve just finished ‘A Day in the Death’, although I didn’t watch ‘Adam’ – and it really is excellent. I’m not convinced by the “so much better than the first series” argument, because both have their flaws, but I’m liking this as much as the first series. Chiefly that’s because – like the first series – Owen is such a riveting character. I know people dislike him, but if anything that’s why I think he’s brilliant. Yeah, in a way, the “Owen redeems himself” style of Series Two may end up taking the teeth out of him a bit, but god help me, I was touched. Note to portraying the Doctor in Doctor Who; it’s often far more uplifting seeing someone who fails win than someone who wins win.

Okay, not that simple; more, it’s better to see someone who wins but always fails at the same time to utterly win, to smash, to... dare I say it... own. Chris Eccleston’s Ninth Doctor exhibited that, and that’s why ‘The Empty Child’s “Just give me this one!” is such a brilliant scene. Tennant is perhaps too heroic sometimes. I don’t think he should lose, but I’d appreciate him to not be brilliantly good at absolutely everything. Or his sonic screwdriver, for that matter.

Owen... own. Hmm.

I’ve sort of been very lazy with this blog recently. I’m not entirely sure why. Well, actually, there’s a few things, I suppose. This writing-out-the-Olive&Lime-Handbook thing is depressingly dull (it’s not even hard, I just can’t work up the motivation to do it. I’m starting to feel depressed just thinking about). My whole sleeping pattern is out of whack at the moment too – I went to bed last night at 2am, for instance, and woke up at 2pm. Also, having such easy access to the internet is just so distracting. And then, there’s the fact that my blog now has a web comic, which is called ‘I can do a web comic too!’.

I wish I had a better name, mind you. The first one was made to do just that; but when I was told by Michael Sandford, Jack Bz and Liam that I should do more, I’ve started doing more. It’s surprisingly fun, even though my drawings are relatively shit. As I’ve managed to finally use the running joke about living penises that I’ve had in my head for years as a constantly-discarded-comic-idea-because-it’s-horrendous.

Also, I opened up two other blogs, Tds4a Yesterday and Tds4a in Time and Space (or, Tds4a TARDIS). The second is fairly obvious, and gives a proper place for my reviews (instead of just off-loading them onto Ugmo for the hell of it). The first is my Journal! Yes, I found a place for it.

‘Course, no-one’s going to read my entire Journal from 2006 to now, but the point is so it’s there, and I can refer back to it if necessary. For example, “Like I said in my rant on Music and Politics back here... *provides link*...”

You know, I’m only writing this, even, because the internet’s done its stopped-working-for-a-bit thing again.

So I have nothing really interesting to write about, I’m afraid. Liam did suggest I do an album review of his Boug album, In Rainbougs (which curiously I haven’t mentioned in these pages yet, but never mind), and I toyed with that idea, even saying things like “uses postmodern devices to establish its place in musical history and make a comment on the musical industry at large.” But... well, it’s not that it’s silly, it’s actually that I can’t be bothered. Or Bouggered, for that matter.

But one thing I did think about writing last night, and therefore actually will, is something that sort of gives insight into the way I do things. By which I mean, sometimes I do things that confuse the hell out of people or they take things I do the wrong way, and I’m going to write about ones I can remember here so that, you know, they might read ‘em and realise where I’m coming from, or something.

103. Argue everything in great detail instead of sweeping statements

This one refers mostly to the internet, but also in real life. When someone says something I disagree with, I tend to quote them, line-by-line/paragraph-by-paragraph, and go into detail, as a direct response to what they said, as to why I disagree.

Take Doctor Who; I tend to write long responses in, er, response to what people write about a story if I disagree with it.

For me, that’s what proper debate is. It’s not about picking holes in what your opponent says, it’s about proving you’ve paid attention to what they’ve said, taken that on board, and are replying to it. It’s not just writing, “I don’t agree, ‘Time and the Rani’ is still shit.”

Unfortunately, I’ve noticed that some people don’t agree; as if they’d prefer for me to come out with a simple “you’re wrong because you’re a tool” (even though that’s hardly what I think!) than a dissection of what they wrote. For some reason, they find the latter more offensive. Maybe it’s because they don’t see writing on a forum as serious a venture as I do (I treat Ugmo seriously too!). I don’t know. For whatever reason, they probably think I’m trying to be all superior to them or something, when really I’m stating my position. I’m being objective. I’m not just saying something like “it’s crap”, which is the kind of thing that I find offensive because it’s far more dismissive than dissecting something is. At least when you dissect something, even if you come to a negative conclusion, it’s one where you pinpoint what didn’t work. That’s far more useful and productive – for the writer of the story, too, who may be reading comments (it happens on OG!) – than a simple “it’s crap.” Honest.

104. Not Hate the Mainstream

For someone who rants for ages about particular bands being brilliant and others being shit, it may seem strange that I don’t hate the mainstream. In fact, I harbour no resentment towards the mainstream at all; being in itself a group, not every single band in it.

Perhaps if I listened to the radio more often or watched Video Hits more often I’d be dismayed, but hey – I don’t. So what’s the issue? For my money, at least half of the people who watch Video Hits or Funniest Home Videos or Big Brother and then rave on about how crap they are actually enjoy it. Oh no, I don’t mean they enjoy the show; I mean they enjoy raving on about how crap it is. And to be honest (and I’ll get on to this later*), I’ve always felt that “crap” is often better than “competence” in entertainment; for instance, Big Brother may be irritating on the level of its contestants being wankers (I’ll get back to this, too), but it’s still a nice concept if you think about it; it’s still its own vehicle in a way that, say, Family Guy isn’t (being an off-load of The Simpsons. Come on, just admit it. I know there’s differences there. I know Stewie’s in it. But it’s still The Simpsons-lite, but ruder and more “random”). And the only reason I can stand Family Guy more than Big Brother, if we’re comparing, is because Big Brother has been running on for too long and doing the same stupid things, and it’s gotten into my face; whereas, even though I personally think Family Guy should have stopped after its first season (easily the best; genuinely clever and funny for most of it), I’ve practically excommunicated myself from all knowledge of it and thereby don’t give a toss anymore.

Oh yeah, about the contestants being wankers – this may seem to contradict my “Dislikeable characters” thing. I mean, I love Owen as a character. In that sense, Big Brother is brilliant in that it shows us how utter wankers who deserve nothing more than to be shunned actually managed to ascend the ranks for little reason other than being in the right place and the right time. It’s a depressing message, one that’s utterly brilliant to show on TV, and therefore one I love. Problem is, Big Brother, whilst it’s not reality in the sense that its sets and structure is constructed, is still reality in the sense that these are real people. And although I like TV showing us the “truth” through fiction, god help me, sometimes seeing the “truth” through reality is just depressing. There, that’s my problem with Big Brother; I find it depressing. Not irritating, not horrible, not stupid (despite, in all three cases, Gretel Kileen!), – just depressing.

But getting back to the mainstream. Thing is, I’m all for there being a mainstream there. In a sense, it’s nice knowing there is such a thing that you can be at an angle at; it may sound arrogant and pretentious, but it does wonders for our self-esteem! But some in the same boat as I hate the mainstream and prefer the little rivers that we row ourselves on (oh god, what a silly metaphor. Hmm, though I suppose it’s the same as all of Sensiship): I don’t, because I appreciate it being there. So what if I actually don’t personally like half of the music? That doesn’t mean they’re useless wastes of space. Without them, we’d be nothing. How can you claim to be outside the mainstream and then to wish it didn’t exist in the first place? If the mainstream was what you liked and what we consider was what they didn’t – and you do because of that (boy, that’s a confusing sentence) – it’d be the same thing, just with slightly different trends.

105. Like Unlikeable Characters

Here we go. Promised I’d get to it! (Though there’s somewhat of a good case to be made for me not following through in my promises, so I hardly blame you if you doubted me. You doubting Tobias)

I think this one boils down to what people approach entertainment for. For me, entertainment is my life, my passion, the thing that makes the world go around (even though obviously it doesn’t. It makes my world go around, if you see what I mean). For others, it could be cooking, it could be, I dunno, cleaning!

So the thing is – and this goes for what people get out of music, too – half of the time people watch TV to be entertained. To, you know, have a nice, cosy laugh and sit back and stuff. I personally can’t see myself doing that, and therefore find it an incredibly alien concept. That’s why, instead, I need entertainment to attack me with all of its emotions, all of its concepts, all of its similarities and differences and themes and metaphors. I give a crap about all of that stuff, and half of the time I’ll end up giving something I’ve seen/read/listened to a pat on the back if it tried to have thematic/conceptual/character-based depth, even if the plot may not be perfect, or the dialogue, or the production. Hence that’s probably why I love Doctor Who; it’s not that I excuse the bad effects, it’s just that I honestly don’t even register them as being “bad effects” sometimes.

‘Course, some register that with surprise, but I don’t see why. I don’t see why me taking it so seriously (yet having a laugh along the way, of course, as you do with all passions in life – including, yes I’m going to be sappy, love!) is such a weird idea. Cooks take food seriously too, and I appreciate that, even if I spend my time eating utter shit in comparison. Similarly, I wish some people would appreciate that some people can just appreciate entertainment on not just a “sit down and watch whatever shit’s on” kind of way. It’s not just something we do when we’re bored, in the same way that cooking isn’t just something that chefs do when they’re hungry.

It’s like that brilliant Tom Baker quote about seeing a trainspotter which goes something like this: “To me, it was just a train, but to him it was a whole world; and I thought, isn’t that just marvellous?”

It is. I may sometimes sound like I’m doing a I’m-right-and-everybody-else-is-wrong mindset in some of the rants and stuff, but really, honestly, I don’t feel that. I feel that I have to make my case eloquently, and that I have to define those things that I honestly feel are “crap” (but as I implied earlier, “crap” is much harder to work out than “I don’t like it”)... but diversity is exciting. Diversity is excellent! Hell, I’m a Doctor Who fan, and there’s nothing I dislike more than when it stops and does the same thing over and over for a bit, because it’s a formula that’s working.

But basically, the thing with unlikeable characters is this; it’s actually as hard to pull off as writing a likeable character, if not harder. I say “as hard” because some audiences just like characters if they’re nice and stuff, but I tend to find these types dull and boring (the Doctor and Rose in Series Two, anyone?); but for me, I think it’s harder. It’s harder to write an unlikeable character convincingly, because they have to have a rationale for it, there has to be a reason, and you have to write the character in such a way that a) they’ve sometimes got a point, if not are actually right, and b) are bloody funny sometimes too. I feel weird saying this, but sometimes the best way to portray a barstard on TV is to make him have a laugh or two.

106. Criticise those/what I like

This one’s a very sore point for me, and I’m sure it is for those who’ve taken the brunt of it and felt bad about it.

Right. I’ve often had times where I’ve found myself debating something with a friend who I think is wrong about something, and they’ll come back and say, for instance, “For fuck’s sake, Dom, does it really matter?” Leaving aside the fact that it does, or I wouldn’t be arguing about it... well, the thing is, it is my fault, of course. I do honestly forget that not everybody wants to debate, that not everybody understands, that...

Well, hear me out. I’ve tried to explain this to them and it still hasn’t gone down well, but here it is; if I didn’t like you, I wouldn’t be talking to you. That’s it at its simplest, but I’ll elaborate. I find fault in everybody, and that’s because I don’t wilfully ignore the faults in anybody. Because I just find it alien to do so. On the outside, yes, in polite conversation, yes, but elsewhere? I’m just not going to do it, because it’s lying. And to those I don’t have to be aware of niceties and shit like that with – and thank god for you all – I’m going to be honest and open about what I think. Since you are, I am too. I feel that’s only fair; but some don’t like being criticised. And sometimes the inference is, “If you disagree with me, why are we friends?”

But it’ll only ever be one thing; I’ll disagree about a certain thing they’ve said about music, or art, or something. And then I’ll explain why. And half of the time – and this is perhaps the most important bit of all – I’m trying to make it better. I’m trying to break down narrow-mindedness, to make you realise that your view isn’t the only one out there – and often, that’s by showing you my view, granted, I accept that, but that’s only because I want there to be debate. The world would be an absolutely shite place without debate. And I didn’t even bloody well do debating at school!

I do this with shows and such, too. I’m as aware of Doctor Who’s faults as its virtues, for instance, which is why I can sometimes go on for ages about what works. But I wouldn’t if I didn’t give a shit in the first place. I mean, do I talk about the virtues and flaws of Lost? Well, no, because I find it boring and dull and always-the-bloody-same. Hey, I’m sure it’s full of great dialogue, great writing, blah blah blah, but the concept just gives me a headache because it’s so narrow, so... consistent.

The thing that’s different about Doctor Who and people is, of course, that I don’t review people. That sounds strange, but what I mean is this; whenever I’ve done a rant on an episode or something that I really despised, I’ll do the opposite next and make sure I write about something that I personally love with every fibre of my being. Even if I’m slightly negative and fed up in another review, I’ll be positive in the next. That’s not covering my tracks or anything; I just want to prove that I still love Doctor Who, faults and all. Because – and this is ALSO a really important point – I genuinely believe that the best things in life have faults. I’m far more in love with, far more enamoured with, and far more passionate about things with flaws. Not because I like to pick at them. But because it makes me feel gloriously a part of you, as if we’re all human, in the same boat, all of those damn clichés but they’re true because I love you all.

And that’s the rub of the matter, and what I was alluding to before; I can say Doctor Who is brilliant fifty times and no-one blinks an eye, but if I say to someone that they’re brilliant over and over again? Hmm. I mean, even today, on MSN, I felt like saying to Charlotte – who got married last month and has a new job and is succeeding impossibly well and I’m genuinely excited for her because she’s a lovely, brilliant, nice person... well, I felt like saying that to her, all of that. But what would it come across as, I wonder? A weird attempt to get into her pants? Probably. Okay, that’s probably unfair of me, but I honestly feel wary about these things because I do dislike it when I’m basically accused of trying to chat a girl up when honestly I’m just trying to help her. Goddamn it, I give a shit! And no, I’m not even gay!

So that’s why I don’t say it in real life. But I will, if you want me to. Even if I feel that I’m being self-conscious and shallow about it – very David Tennant-esque, actually, always complimenting Rose – I’ll still do it, because I mean it. And basically, anyone who’s reading this as it’s posted on my blog, or reading it in this Journal, will be someone I give a shit about, so here; I love you! I adore you! You’re brilliantly awesome! Thank you for even bothering to put up with me!

107. Finding Flaws in People

Linked to what I saying before; I also sometimes find the flaws in people fascinating. It’s a very unlikeable trait to have, as it makes me some kind of weird psychological dissecter/prober – and no-one, not even hillbillies, likes being probed – and I’m sorry if it offends you. Thing is, I can’t help it. I do find people fascinating, honestly. It’s probably some kind of disorder I have*.

I can’t really defend this one, because it’s just something I do; but hey, can I be honest? I find flaws in myself far more often than other people. The only reason I spend this Journal – and blog – ranting about other people and things’ flaws rather than mine is that, well, it’d hardly be universal, would it? Me complaining about myself all the time would be angsty, and worse still, dull.

But here we go; I’m lazy, a terrible (or should that be “really good”?) liar, I’m not up to scratch health-wise, I can react a bit weirdly sometimes, I can sometimes be quite arrogant. And that’s putting it nicely. For anyone who’s ever been annoyed with me or disappointed with me, I’m sure you could put it far better and heavier than that – and I implore you to!

*Oh, I wish... as I’ve expressed before, I sometimes genuinely wish I was a bit mad, because – no, I don’t want it just as an excuse! – it would make me far more than I am. Look at Stephen Hawking, for god’s sake; even Lawrence Miles is genuinely “Mad Larry”.

...aaaand... there’ll be more if I think of more. So (don’t) look forward to that!

...*No I won’t. Uh, not yet anyway.