I’ve now caught up with ‘Adam’ from Series Two of Torchwood, which brings up my opinion of it even more! I’m still not convinced by that whole better-than-the-first-series argument; I think it’s fairer to say that it’s more an excellent elaboration and cementing of the first series and its themes in a more calm and confident way, rather than simply being better. Which it’s not. I mean, the first series was a pilot series, what do you expect?
And of course Doctor Who’s first series of the New Series was far more confident and staggering. That’s because – wait for it – it was a 40 year old show! Regardless of whether it was an old dog learning new tricks (even though it wasn’t; what the media and some fans don’t realise is that Doctor Who didn’t just stop at ‘89 and suddenly become hugely different in ‘05; without the New Adventures and such, there wouldn’t be a New Series that worked!), it still had a big backlog of failures and successes to draw upon. Torchwood’s only point of reference was Doctor Who and, by extension, The X-Files and shows like that, and of course since it wanted to sculpt its own identity, it did things that those shows wouldn’t have done (the blatant sexuality), which is what got fans already sceptical about it really riling against it in the first place.
Now, yesterday, Jack Bz said of my blog post (which was basically the last two – or first two, now! – Journal entries) that he sort of now knew more about me and stuff (that’s the way he said it, haha). It turns out that I’m learning stuff about “Dom Kelly” too, and “Dominic Kelly” for that matter. Last night I went onto Google to discover all of my namesakes (mainly because of a slew of Ugmo injokes, but forget about that), and some of them are astonishing.
I will repeat those that I saw and give my opinions of them. Of course, in the interests of privacy, I’m not going to tell you what all of these Dom Kellys’ names are. I have to keep something private, after all.
108. ???
Career: Musician
No, this isn’t the clarinettist either! This is in fact some bloke who makes “Dark electronica” music, with his album Gothronica. It’s a bit boring, to be honest, but not horribly shite or anything... otherwise I’d be really embarrassed. Apparently his music has been used on NCIS, which disturbs me because, well, the main character looks like Captain Jack in Torchwood, which I was just watching and... yeah. God.
Here’s a link to the site (free promotion, mate!): http://www.ezsite.bz/DominicKelly/dom_kelly_mp3s.htm
It’s also a bit creepy, as Jack Bz pointed out, the usage of the “bz”. Well, for obvious reasons, now. Should be obvious, anyway.
“Dominic Kelly: What is your vision?” Oh, I don’t know. Sounds a wee bit pretentious to me (mainly because it doesn’t seem to be a theme that’s at all linked in to the albums or songs I’ve looked at).
In the background bit, he says that his gothic music has been used in NCIS basically because there’s a goth character in it, Abby Sciuto (Pauley Perrette). I remember this character from the irritating “Seriously, I’m a celebrity, I swear. Seriously, Ten” ads.
...I also found this weird nude rating site, that isn’t pornographic in the slightest. It discusses, in rather astonishingly coherent and detailed ways, subjects like “Should women have visible hair in nude shoots?” I find it perplexing that such immense verbosity can be utilised for something like this, in such a professional sounding way, but then again, I shouldn’t be too surprised – gyaenocology, for instance.
109. ???
Career: Dickhead
This guy’s brilliant. I’m not going to link you this time because it’d be harsh of me (or even more harsh than I’m already being), but he’s hilariously funny. He thinks he’s the coolest man in the whole entire world, I’d say. Indeed, he describes himself as a “tool sik”. He also wants to transport his mate to Iraq to “merk terrorists”. Yeah, he laughs after saying that, but I thought jokes had to make sense to be funny, you know? Intriguingly, much like what I was saying before, he too holds the view that “I like girls nt hairy girls doe”, so presumably this is a Dom Kelly trait.
Me? Uh, I dunno! I haven’t really thought about it.
You can add his MSN, but “haters get denied”, so I’d watch out for that.
Seriously though, he seems perfectly harmless, just a bit up himself, which is fine. Hey, I’m a bit up myself; everyone is a bit up themselves. It’s like we all enjoy giving ourselves bumjacks.
Also, he has a mate called Condom Tom, which made me laugh for ages. It made me laugh even more when I went onto this guy’s Myspace and read that it’s a “long story” as to why he’s called Condom Tom. Hahahaa, how long can it be, man? Kids were calling me Condom from the first moment they met me, so I wouldn’t think that Condom Tom could be too much of a leap.
He does dislike “pricks hu think there better than you”, though, so I’m going to give him the thumbs up.
(Actually, he’d probably read the paragraph about his name that I just wrote and figure I’m acting like I’m superior to him by laughing at what he said. Well, no. Honest. As I’ve said in this Journal/blog millions of times, and more recently just-the-other-day, I do laugh at peoples’ faults, but more importantly I’m bloody well aware of mine. Hey, I can’t even get a workable Myspace going, that’s how crap and inept I am)
He lists his occupation as “Mugging pensioners”!
Why am I talking about this guy? He’s not one of the Dom Kelly’s!
Right, let’s search for some more.
110. ???
Career: Global Warming Denier
And as we all know, all haters get denied.
(That’s honestly the best name for a rap album. “Haters get denied”. I love it! It also says to anyone who doesn’t like the album, “Well, guess what? WE DENY YOU.” Brilliant. I genuinely love it, ahahaa)
Anyway. On the web there’s this brief article about global warming and efforts in the workplace to make a difference, which I can’t be fucked reading.
He and some guy called Wiseboy – most appropriate name ever! – both basically deny global warming in the manner that one would deny the Holocaust. Well, okay, not that extreme – and actually they’re not exactly brothers-in-arms (you never are in the workplace) – but it’s still a bit bitchy and deliberately-naive. Apparently global warming is a fairytale that’s been repeated so often that we’ve all come to believe it. They both say that they haven’t seen evidence of this, and Dom Kelly says that “only when we hear the other side of the argument can we arrive at the truth.”
Right, well, his statement is a bit biased; it basically implies that everything you know is false, and whenever someone tells you the opposite is true, it’s automatically true. If the quote were something like “Once you know both sides of the argument, you can make up your mind” I wouldn’t mind, but his comment is sneaky and nasty in a read-between-the-lines manner.
‘Sides, I’m sick of this whole “where’s your evidence?” thing. This isn’t a fucking courtroom – we’re talking about global warming, not about murder or something. A lack of evidence doesn’t mean it’s true. Besides, scientists have evidence, it’s just not evidence that you can present to someone automatically and have it believed. By which I mean, if you were to prove to someone that global warming was happening, you’d have to make them sit in a helicopter over Antarctica for twenty years and then show them what’s happening. And that’s frankly crap, it’s like assuming that evolution didn’t happen because you weren’t around to see it. There’s more evidence for evolution than creation, and therefore we tend to believe the former. Similarly, there’s more evidence that there is global warming rather than there isn’t, so it’s just obviously having an agenda. It’s not like the scientists who discovered global warming had an agenda, is it? I mean, what possible benefit could that have for them? But the benefit for businesses in not believing in global warming is, well, more beneficial to them. The sneaky gits.
By the way, “Where’s your evidence” goes – and this may sound weird considering what I said just then about evolution – for denying the existence of God vehemently. Hey, believe that he doesn’t exist, or believe that he does. But I dislike the snobbery of atheists sometimes, the whole “you’ve all been sucked in!” thing that goes on. It’s utter bullshit. Some have been sucked in, extremists for instance, but to throw all of religion in the one little group like that, to declare it a “disease” as Mr Lalla Ward has done before, is just the height of irritating arrogance. Creationists get to me because they wilfully ignore everything thrown against them. But snobbish atheists get to me because they believe they know everything. I mean, there’s no evidence that God exists, but there’s hardly any that he doesn’t, is there? For all we know, God could even just be a piece of sputum on Mars. Who knows? Who cares? The implication that being atheist automatically means you’re more intelligent and aware of the world around you is just shite, to be honest. Science isn’t foolproof either; even someone as brilliant as Stephen Hawking (what a champ this guy is, honestly) will admit that.
To clarify, I’m not an atheist; I thought I was, until I realised that the checklist for being a “true” atheist strangely enough reminded me of the checklist for being a “true” Christian, just at opposite ends of the spectrum. For instance, instead of, “You will worship God every waking hour”, it was more like, “You will kick God in the nuts if you ever see him and then tell him he doesn’t exist”. I’m an agnosticist, as it happens; I’m hardly going to make a judgement one way or the other until we have a shiteload of absolutely provable evidence thrown away. Why should I? What right do I have to determine whether God exists or not? It’s not like I’m the fount of knowledge here. And I bloody well wish some atheists would realise that too.
...see, Condom Tom? I do hate people who think they’re better than other people! :)
I bet you, though, if I’d said I was a Christian and not an agnosticist, that would have been the damning factor. As in, “Oh, you’re a Christian, what would you know?” That level of grouping, of immediate stereotyping and that level of utter snobbish crap, gets to me too.
111. ???
Career: Undies-dropper-er
Some guy on Youtube who gets “dekegged”. It’s a rather crap video, mainly because it’s obvious that the guy in question is obviously expecting it.
112. ???
Career: Lecturer
He’s a senior lecturer of Politics at the University of Sheffield. Er... and good on him!
(I have nothing more to say, I’m afraid. Geez, I had to more to say about a guy having his undies pulled down than a professorship in politics)
(Actually, it’s an associate professorship. It’s just that “professorship in politics”, if you take first letter of each word, spells out “Pip”, thereby being stereotypically English and South Park-referencing)
113. ???
Career: Storyteller
I’ve never seen this guy before in my life. Although he appears to have no ears.
An English storyteller. That’s heart-warming, I guess.
114. ???
Career: Accountants
This guy set up Dominic Kelly & Co in 1992. Unfortunately it’s not a group meeting of Dom Kelly’s, but rather an accountant service. Their business motto appears to be: “Business advisors and partners, not just a complete necessity”. Pretty bang on the money, though it’s not the most catchy of mottos, I must say.
115. ???
Career: Writes about viruses
I can’t get my head around all of this medical jargon; I’d have to backread for ages to even understand this. Suffice to say, though, the fact that the site is called “Hot Topics in Infection and Immunity in Children” raised my eyebrow, being as it sounds unintentionally comedic. I mean, the use of “hot topics” both puns on the word “hot” and makes it sound like Hot Jokes for Cool Kids.
Hot Diseases for Sick Kids. That’d be a great book. You could get Thorpey to do a foreword and everything.
(Well, a foreword made up for two words)
116. ???
Career: Dancer
Pretty cool! There’s a video on Youtube about it.
Apparently though, the guy’s name is actually Dominique, and the site got it wrong. That’s cool, although I do wonder why he has the girl name instead.
117. What I’ve Learnt
I’ve learnt that all other Dom Kelly’s are either far more successful and/or cool than me. But I will strive for a better career, I will be the best I can be, and god help me, HATERS WILL BE DENIED!
